Bodies don't worry. It took me awhile to notice it at first. Like when someone turns off a television that's been blaring non-stop for hours and before you even know what's missing, you just feel lighter. Like pure oxygen is filling the room. The background music of everyday social life (that scratchy tape loop hiccuping "Did I do the right thing?...Did I do the right thing?...Did I do the right thing?") had been switched off and the sudden silence was still crackling, cooling and expanding, opening up more and more space for me to breathe and move. I was completely alone in the world, which meant I was also completely free, and the only word sufficient to encompass the change both in me and the world was prairie: Beautiful. Empty. Sufficient environmental resource to survive if you know where to look.
But if bodies don't worry, what is this I'm feeling?
